You're All I Have
by RiversMelody
Summary: Pepper is dead and Tony is broken. He seeks Steve for comfort and care. But when someone from Steve's past comes back and steals his heart, will Tony realize how much he cares for Captain America?
1. Chapter 1

It had been a month since the death of Pepper Pots. Tony Stark was completely and utterly broken. He rarely made snarky or cocky remarks anymore. He barely even spoke. He had distanced himself from everyone, even Jarvis. Tony Stark had become someone completely different. Tony Stark was quiet and isolated man.

Night after night, the man of iron would cry himself to sleep, lulling himself into the same repetitive night mare. Pepper was always there, in his arms. She begged him to save her, to stop the pain. But no matter how hard he tried, she always slipped away into the darkness, leaving him with a cold, lifeless angel in his arms.

At this point, he would wake up screaming in agony. It had gotten so bad; the others convinced him to sound proof his room and even still, they all wore earplugs to bed. Everyone except Steve. The ear plugs and the sound proofing didn't stop him from hearing the broken hearted man's cries. So every night, around 2am, Steve would get up and walk down the hall to Stark's room. He would tell him through the door that he needed to go back to sleep, that it was just a dream, and that everything would be alright.

Bur Steve woke up at 4am, to screaming, and he was worried. Tony usually went back to bed after 2am and never woke again. But tonight was different. So Steve walked down the hall to his room and slowly opened the door. Tony was in his bed, tossing and turning and crying. "Tony? It's just a dream." He called out into the darkness. But Tony did not respond. Steve sighed and decided he had no choice. He pinned Tony to the bed and told him to wake up. "It's just a stupid dream!" he yelled. He reacted this time, but in a completely different way than Steve expected. "Pepper?" he cried out. Tony lunged forward and kissed Steve passionately. Panicked and confused, Steve jumped back.

It took Tony only seconds to realize what he had done. Instead of making a comment on "liking it" he began to cry. Steve was taken aback. It was so unlike Stark to even shed a tear. "Tony?" he whispered to him, who now had his head in his hands. Steve sat down next to him on the bed and hesitantly put his arm around him. When Tony didn't jump back, Steve rested his head on his. "She was all I had." Tony sobbed. Steve rubbed Tony's shoulder. "No. You have me."


	2. Chapter 2

_**Thank you guys for favoriting my last chapter, and for reviewing it and asking me to continue. That has never happened to me before and you guys made me cry (I don't get out much and I'm slightly over emotional xD) I'm not sure how long I'll continue this fic, but if you guys keep reviewing it and liking it, I will continue as long as you like. This chapter will be a little less angst, and a bit cuter (in my opinion) so please… enjoy :D**_

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Steve woke up in Tony's empty bed, to the sound of the TV. He rolled over to look at the clock. It was 6am. He knew that the only one that got up that early was Stark. He decided to drag himself out of bed to see how he was doing. There was something inside him that was pushing him to see Tony, as if he needed to see Tony to survive. But in reality, he knew he just really wanted to see him.

Tony was in the living room watching his dad's old videos on the projector, as Steve suspected. Howard Stark, the man who had risked his life to find him. "Morning Soldier." Tony said, without turning around. Steve smiled "Good morning, man of iron." Steve sat down next to him, and gestured to the screen. "He was a great man." Tony just snickered. "He was a crap father." Steve smiled at Tony. He was happy to hear at least one snarky comment come out of his mouth. Steve touched his arm "So. Are you feeling any better?" Tony nodded "Yea… thanks Cap." Steve didn't answer. He just turned to the huge screen and began to watch a aged version of his friend talk about Stark Industries on a sepia colored screen.

Natasha woke up shivering. Again. Clint had stolen the covers. Again. She rolled her eyes and fought back the urge to not push him off the bed. "Asshole" she mumbled as she put her pajamas back on, and took her ear plugs out. She crept down the stairs silently, which wasn't hard for her, being a trained assassin and all. She headed straight to the coffee machine, not noticing Steve and Tony on the couch, practically cuddling. But as she poured the coffee into the mugs for her and Barton, she looked up and almost spilt the coffee all over the marble counter. She bit her tongue, wanting to say something about their not so heterosexual moment, but she decided to keep quiet. Blackmail.  
She finished making the coffee, without them even noticing she was there. _So the womanizer playboy turns out to be gay…. That's a twist. _She thought to herself as she carried the coffees back upstairs, still without the two soldiers noticing.

"Steve?" Tony whispered absent mindedly. Steve looked down at Tony who was resting his head on his shoulder. "Yeah Stark?" he whispered back. "I'm sorry for kissing you last night." He apologized. "I thought you were… her." He choked out. Tony felt like an idiot. He couldn't even say her name without it hurting. Steve paused, wanting to say he was sorry for pulling away, and that he wished the kiss had lasted longer. But it hardly seemed appropriate. "I forgive you… I understand." He finally managed to say. Their eyes met for a moment, a moment that went on forever. Tony couldn't help but drown in his ocean blue eyes. Steve looked away, feeling nervous and mentally slapping himself at the same time. Tony's heart sank. He wasn't entirely sure what was going on between them, but it hurt when Steve cut the rope and ruined the moment.

For the next few days, Tony had stopped having nightmares. He slept dreamlessly and peacefully. He began to work with Bruce on his experiments, and occasionally piss Barton off by hitting on Nat. Steve was happy too. He liked seeing Tony smile again and hearing his snarky comments, even thought half of them pissed him off. They had begun to have a routine together; every morning they would watch a few of Tony's version of home movies.

Tony tried to cover the screen one morning, when it showed a younger version of him playing with a Captain America action figure. Steve's jaw dropped and he began to laugh. "Is that… that's me!" Tony sat back down with a displeased expression on his face. "Shut up. It was one of the only toys my father ever gave me." Steve just laughed. The video cut off suddenly and changed to a black and white video, which was upside down. Curious, Tony said "Jarvis, can you turn this video right side up?" Jarvis did so "Yes sir. It seems as if your father left the camera on while he wasn't filming." Steve looked at Tony, confused. Tony just shrugged "Play." He commanded to the projector. As he did so, a female voice came on the speakers. "Stark, I'm begging you." She pleaded. "No. It's not safe." The woman scoffed. "You said before it was perfectly safe! You just don't want me to! But the truth is, I need to do this. I can't wait around for 50, 60, 70 years for him to wake up. I'll be dead by then!" Howard Stark sighed as he walked into the view of the camera. "You found him. Isn't that enough?" Tony chuckled "Please don't turn into some freaky porn video he made." Steve didn't quite get it but laughed too. The woman sighed. "You just don't get it do you heartless bastard! I love him Stark! I had to listen to him fly the plane into the ocean!" Steve put his hand over his mouth. Tony turned to him, "What's wrong? My dad was a heartless bastard." Steve shook his head "They're talking about me. And the girl… Peggy…" he trailed off, saddened. Tony didn't bother asking. It obviously pained him to talk about her.

The video continued, finally showing Peggy's face. Tony could see the pain in Steve's face. _He loved her… _he realized. Tony turned his attention back to the screen "Cryogenic freezing isn't something to joke around with Peggy. You can't just…" Peggy cut him off, "I don't care. Just do it!" Howard sighed. "Fine. But don't say I didn't warn you…" the video cut off. Steve turned Tony. "What's cryogenic freezing?"


	3. Chapter 3

**I feel really bad, I haven't updated in a week. Im really sorry! I've had CPTs (final projects) and exams to study for. I promise I will try to upload more after exams. 3 thank you guys for the reviews!**

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Steve's head was spinning. Peggy could be alive, breathing and possibly even searching for him. She was probably confused with all the technology, like him, and maybe even regretting her decision to chase after her war time love.  
But she still meant the world to him. She had been the last thing he had thought of when he had crashed the dreaded plane into the ice and the first thing he had thought of when he had woken up, 70 years late for their date. She had been the first (real, willing and enjoyable) kiss and really, the first woman he had talked too besides his mother. Peggy had seen him grow from the little guy from Brooklyn who had lied on his army application forms, to the super soldier who `had basically completely come out of a test tube. But somehow, she hadn't really cared that he had changed. She just saw him as a man with a big heart, who laid himself on a dummy grenade while his team mates ran and hid.  
Steve realized he had made his way to the basement of the Avengers Mansion, to where the gym was. He flicked on the lights to find his one stress reliever. The punching bags.

Tony had turned the projector off a while ago and was now sitting at the island in the kitchen. He heard Natasha giggle as Barton whispered something in her ear. _Go brag about your not so secret relationship somewhere else. _Tony thought to himself as Barton left, grabbing an apple on the way out. Natasha swiftly sat herself down across from Tony "So. How was your couch time with Captain Cuddles this morning?" she grinned as Tony spit out his coffee. She had been dying to poke at Tony or Steve all morning. "Wait...How… did you..?" Tony stammered. Nat just laughed as she mopped up the coffee with a cloth. "Trained assassin, remember?" Tony sighed. "Well I'll have you know, we were not cuddling and also, it didn't end well." Natasha mock pouted at him. "Does Rogers not a fan of ACDC or your talking house?" Tony narrowed his eyes. "No. We were watching my dad's videos and it turns out, his British girlfriend was put into a cryogenic freezing lab by my father." Nat frowned "Aw. So she's alive and she's going to steal Capt. away from you?" Tony made a face. "Still mocking me?" Natasha put her arms up in defense. "Hey, it's not my fault you decided to rebound to the guy who has a girlfriend. Like I said, love is for children."Tony smirked. "Right 'cause it's just sex for you and Barton?" her jaw dropped "I… why don't you go ask your boyfriend if he needs help with those punching bags? Maybe you could even schedule a make out session!" Tony chuckled. "Where are you going? Don't you have red to get off your ledger?" Tasha rolled her eyes. "Go clean your suit Stark."

The next few weeks dragged on. Tony started to have nightmares again and Steve stopped entering his room to calm him down. He went back to their old routine of knocking on the door at 2am.  
Tony and Bruce began to work on a suit for the Hulk. Bruce had fought against the idea but at heart, he actually wanted to suit up with the others. Tony was trying everything, from genetically modified spandex to nylon. But nothing worked. He stayed up late most night, getting angry at everything that failed. "I'm useless" he mumbled angrily, as he stormed out to the balcony. He leaned against the railing, looking up at the stars. It reminded him of the night him and Pepper had almost kissed. He sighed, trying to rid the pain in his heart. He looked down at the pool, which was glowing bright blue, just like Steve's eyes. Why was the universe so cruel?


	4. Chapter 4

_I'm so sorry! I haven't updated for countless reasons, exams, CPTs, studying, packing for my trip to NYC (so excited) watching the new show True Love (such an amazing show. it's not as cheesy as it sounds. I recommend it to all David Tennant fans!) And also for the past few days I've been sick. (Just my luck I get a bad cold on the first day of vacation) These excuses are just what they are but I feel terrible for not updating. But here's a new chapter! I hope you like it! Please R&R_

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Tony sighed looking down at the arch reactor in his chest, He knew he could end it right here, right now. The pain, the memories, hell he might even see Pepper if he pulled it out, if there was a god. But something… something strong and unknown stopped him. He hung his head, somewhat ashamed of even thinking about it.

"Trouble sleeping?" Steve asked from behind him. "When don't I?" Tony replied snarkily. "Point taken." Steve chuckled. "Anything on your mind?" he asked cautiously. Tony shrugged "Oh you know, dead girlfriend, and some skinny love." He bit his tongue even though he knew Steve would have no idea what that meant. Steve nodded. "I'm sorry…about her. I wish I could have helped." _I would do anything to make you happy again. _He thought to himself. He really did have no idea what 'skinny love' meant but he decided just to act like he did. And he secretly wished it was about him. Tony patted Steve's shoulder "It's all good Capsicle. It… you… I…we couldn't have saved her." He stuttered.

Steve touched Tony's hand that was resting on his shoulder. "It's just… I know how it feels to lose someone you love." Tony just laughed bitterly. "You get your long lost love back. I can never get Pepper back" he said her name with such sadness, Steve wanted to hold him close like he used to. But he didn't move an inch. "I meant my friend. Bucky. He… fell off a train in the mountains. Seventy years later, I still strongly believe it's my fault and I won't ever forgive myself." Tony looked into Steve's saddened eyes. He felt guilty for commenting. "You're even luckier. You can get drunk and forget it all at least for one night. I can't. I will always remember Bucky, reaching for my hand, the fear in his eyes… his screaming…" his voice trailed off; his throat felt thick and his voice threatened to break. "I'm a soldier. I'm supposed to be strong." He whispered, turning away from Tony, hiding a tear.

Tony touched Steve's chin. "Look at me. You know what? Sometimes, the hero's, the soldiers, need to break, they need to mourn and cry over their lost loved ones." Tony felt on the verge of tears himself. Steve turned to Tony. "Do you believe that?" he whispered. Tony squeezed his shoulder gently. "Steve, you can cry. It doesn't make you less of a man or weak. Soldiers can cry. And I promise I won't tell anyone if you do." Steve smiled and wrapped his arms around Tony. He did cry, but not just over Bucky. He cried because he had no idea if he was going to be able to choose between Peggy and the Man of Iron.

Tony jumped up in success. "Banner!" he hollered down the hall to the kitchen. "Banner!" Bruce appeared in the hallway. "Yelling at me and scaring the crap out of me isn't the smartest thing to do, Stark." Bruce sighed, staying calm as he usually did, but he was obviously pissed. He held half a mug of coffee in his hand, the rest on his white shirt. "Oops. Sorry big guy. But I think I finally figured out what material to use! So I just need you to turn into Godzilla so I can test it." Tony was grinning with excitement. "You know, if I change right now, the other guy just might pulverize you." Tony groaned. "Aw come on. I thought you could control him." Bruce rolled his eyes. "I can, but only to certain extent. And I guarantee the likely hood of the other guy squishing you is so much more before I finish my coffee." Bruce turned and headed back to the kitchen, almost walking in to Steve.

"What's up with him?" he asked. Tony shrugged "I may have caused him to spill half his coffee on himself. Steve sighed "You're terrible. He could have killed one of us." Tony laughed. "Come on Capsicle. Live a little." Steve rolled his eyes and leaned against the door frame. "Not when it involves people almost dying." Tony rolled his eyes.

Steve had the under layer of the uniform on. The thin blue spandex hid nothing and his boots made him oh so innocent. Tony felt red creep up onto his cheeks. "Are you blushing Stark?" Steve asked. Tony turned away "Uh. No. Wha… How about you uh suit up, we could go to the training arena… uh practice a bit." Steve chuckled. "Alright, Mr. Stark. I'll meet you there." He left with a sparkle in his eyes that made Tony melt. Tony shook his head, trying to wipe the thoughts he was having. _Steve…in the shower. Jesus that man is the definition of perfection. _Tony shook his head. The man was straight and catholic. There was no way he would get in the shower with him. But Tony could dream.

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_The last part was inspired by when Steve and Tony were in a room talking about Agent Phil Colson (Rest In Peace) and Steve was just wearing the under layer of his suit and his adorable booties. I kind of adore that scene for that reason ;) that sexy star spangled man.  
Anyways, thank you so much for reading. I will try to write a new chapter before I go to NYC, Harrisburg, Pennsylvania and __**Intercourse**__, Pennsylvania.(it's a real place. I swear, Google it. It's in Amish Country.) But I will write more because I have to spend a total of 24 hours on a train. I won't be able to update for a few weeks though because right when I get back from the states, I have to visit my grandparents for a week and they have dial up internet. -.-  
Thank you guys for sticking with me and reading! Happy summer!_


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